A mom on how her son got past years of test anxiety
Luke had years of test anxiety his mom describes as total paralysis, going blank on material he had completely memorized. Three lessons in he took an APUSH test and got a hundred, and by the end of his practice tests he was getting 36s on the English and the reading.
Transcript
He has a very long history of very bad test anxiety. When I say my son has a long history of test anxiety, it's not like, oh, he gets a little funny. He would go blank. He would study and have everything totally memorized, and the recall wasn't there. It was total paralysis. So that's why I was a little suspicious about, like, how was he going to do this.
This had been going on for years, and we've done all of the cognitive behavioral therapy strategies of, this is what you do when you feel this, and this is what you do. But again, no matter what, he never felt he could do it. No matter how much he prepared, he felt like the test was always there to throw him, and it was very hard to undo that. So I was cautiously optimistic, but I was just a little worried.
We also talked about this concept of test optional. I don't actually think it's totally optional. I think that you're better off taking it than not taking it, because if you can do it you should do it, because it will help. He said, I want to do this, with all the stuff that's going on and all the demands. We still thought that embarking on the test prep was going to be a better choice, because if he walked into that feeling better, he would walk out of... Even though there was absolutely no time, we did it.
I had an older son do some other test prep years ago, and it was just repetition, repetition. So I wasn't going to go back to that. After doing some homework and getting other parental feedback that Test Prep Gurus was great, that's what I said: okay, this is the one we're going to do.
From the absolute beginning it was flawless. He asked me all about my son. How he tested, how he learns, what did he have going on, where did he have struggles, and what was he looking for. Who are you, how do you learn, what's your story, what was his goal. That individualized attention. What's your life like, and how can we fit into it, not how do you fit into our life. So that's a huge difference. I think all high school students these days are a little bit chaotic.
The beginning was, here's your teachers. Based on your profile, this is who's going to be best for you. The teachers that Luke worked with didn't treat him like he couldn't do it. From the get-go it was, okay, we're going to do this. So they kind of set the stage.
He did the practice test. He walked out feeling very defeated. He was like, well, that didn't go well, you know. And so I said, okay, but that's okay, that's why you're here. And it was, I didn't finish, I was second guessing. That's a big thing he would do, is just spiral on one question, thinking he knew it, then second guessing himself. Okay, well, I guess it can only get better from here.
And then he started his first lesson. Luke came home the first day from his lesson after a very long day at school, and I was like, okay. And I said, how'd it go? He said, that was okay. Why was it great? He said, there was so much that I was doing that was working against me, that was making it harder for me. I can change the way I do this. I can change the way I test.
Three lessons later he took an APUSH test and got a hundred. And I said, okay, you know what. He's like, well, I was just applying the stuff about testing and pacing and reading and not second guessing. And since then his testing in general has improved incredibly.
These two people, I have no idea who they are. I've never met them. I feel so grateful to them, because I don't know how they did what they did, but they took this kid who was paralyzed by tests and they changed him. They engaged him and they collaborated with him and they coached him. They were not condescending, they were not punitive. They went at it and spoke to him like he was a human being, and they gave him strategy. It's, here's the screwdriver, here's the... you know, do this and this. And it made Luke feel empowered by the whole process.
It was so individualized. It wasn't like, well, these are the lessons that we're doing. It was, you know, Luke hates geometry. He makes no bones about it. He needed extra in that, again, because if you're not interested in it you're not going to focus on it as well. And so it was targeted to that. He was a little rusty on commas and semicolons, and Ian was like, okay, here we go. It was really so individualized, not just to him as a learner but him as a human being. The fact that they took the time to get to know him, to get to see what his strengths were, to identify the weaknesses but then use the strengths to get to the weaknesses, is such a collaborative effort and such a kind effort. And I don't believe for a second that they would treat every single kid the same way, and that's how such improvement is made.
I think how to read passages, or how to break down multiple choice, or what to do when I'm stuck, that is a huge one, right? Rather than circling the drain, okay, what do you do instead. I think that the whole thing really is about test strategy, which can be applied universally. You know, I understand, oh, it's for the ACT, or it's for the SAT, but tests are tests. And in school, children are not taught strategy of tests. They're just not. It's like, learn it, spit it back, do it. I don't think we can get the best out of them without doing this.
By the time he was finishing his practice test he was getting 36s on the English and the reading, because there was just automaticity to it, and again he knew what tools to apply where. When he went to take his ACT, the real one, I was expecting a lot more darkness. Instead he was like, it's okay, I'm okay. He was appropriately anxious, but he wasn't panicked. I can do this. It is a test that I have to take and I will master it, and if I don't, there's, you know.
How has he changed as a result of going through the program? So that's a very different place for a student to be in, a student who is constantly petrified of the next test, because in education there's a, oh yeah. It's a different approach, it's a different kid. I saw the change happen. And how you see it changes how you feel about it, and how you feel about it changes how you cope with it, and how you cope with it changes how you produce.
I'm not a huge fan of tests in general. I don't think they necessarily reflect what a person knows, but they are a necessary evil. It's not just ACT, it's licensing exams, or the bar exam, or whatever it is. There are exams, you know. So to be better at them in general is going to do you favors in life.
He's always been into the arts, but he also loves medicine. He's always loved bio and anatomy, and he's in emergency medicine now. What's interesting is that in the past he's always been like, yeah, I'll never get through those tests. And it's funny, because recently I was like, well, if you decide to do that, what do you think about the MCATs? He's like, I can do it. So, you know, wherever he goes and whatever he does, it's his choice. But just the fact that potentially his issues with tests would have held him back from something, that's no longer an issue. Again, it's not just the ACT. It's, can you manage these situations? And the answer is yes.
What would you say to any parents that are considering doing this? Do it. It's so much about building confidence and strategy that is going to take them beyond just this point. You know, before you know it all of this section of life is over, but then there's more. So I would say look at the bigger picture. Even if you think your kid might not wind up sitting for the ACT or the SAT, I actually think test strategy is an amazing thing to do and to learn about, because it's going to apply to other areas. It's working on those critical thinking skills, and even the timing and the coping, that will make changes so far beyond just that test.
I would say if you want to help your child, if you can help your child in this way, get to a better place with all of this stuff, it is so well worth it. And again, it's so not just about the tests that they're studying for. In this case it's about overall strategy. So it's very valuable.
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